Why Are You Bothering Me?

Why do students think I care about their lives? Why do they keep talking to me and sharing every detail of their weekends or lives with me?

What I'm Thinking: Go away. I don't care. Stop talking to me.

What I say: Wow, that's so cool! Sounds like a lot of fun.

And why do they always do this when I'm grading? Then they get all pissy when their papers aren't returned to them in five minutes! Then when I do tell them politely to "piss off" they keep talking! Or they act all hurt like I just killed a box of baby puppies. Teenagers are stupid and irrational. Grow a frontal lobe already!